Just chillin' listening to the Christmas station on pandora. Oh yeah. Christmas music. I think its in the genes to start this early. For reals.
Perhaps you noticed a little sabbatical in my writing. I was feeling complain-y about life in general and I just don't want that to be what this blog is about so I peaced out for a while. But I have been asking God for authenticity in my life lately, so here it is.
Schmoopy turned one last week which is just crazy talk. He's playful and a people explorer. He's also going through his own little complain-y phase which I thought might result in one less kiddo yesterday. Yowza. Teeth and vaccinations - need I say more?
Lady Belle is in a super cool "let's test every boundary known to man" phase herself which is .... Blah blah blah. I'm just tired talking about it.
So back to complaining - so many times when I want to share what's happening with us, I think, regardless of typical or non-typical every parent goes through these moments of gosh, this is just hard every second of the day right now. Please know my heart is not to be a constant complainer.
Little Hansdome is doing pretty well. I think what taints how well he is doing in my heart and mind - and oftentimes clouds my personal judgement on his progress - is that anytime he makes leaps in his development or gets new targets in ABA - behavior probs follow. Completely normal, but this keeps me from sometimes giving the whole story when someone asks for an update. The fact of the matter is that it's a constant struggle from morning to night. It's constant and complicated.
If you've ever been on a mission trip and come home and just attempt to communicate a smidgen of what The Lord did - what you experienced - it's almost impossible to express it all, especially if people are really just wanting a quickie answer from you. It's overwhelming at times. I wish I had a compact sound byte, but that just isn't real life.
And this anxiety is one of those genetic things that I know I so passed down - enjoy Little Handsome! No really, sometimes the anxiety of a change I don't like just paralyzes and silences me.
Oh wait, Christmas music break with Harry Connick Jr. Somebody pass me a hot chocolate and some snow.
K, I'm back. In our small group on Sunday morning we're taking a stroll through James. A couple of weeks ago we talked about works, faith and believing God and I talked about how I feel like as long as I have my own two hands on everything with Little Handsome - as long as I am in control - he'll be ok.
This is just a flat out lie from the devil. I was reminded of a clip of a movie (which shall remain nameless) about loving a puppy so much that you squeeze him to death.
Right. I have to let him go, give him up - every. single. day. And so many days, several times a day. This is my act of obedience - to give him up to the One who knows Little Handsome perfectly and completely. Easy to write. Hard to live out.
So the Scripture was fulfilled that says, Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him for righteousness, and he was called God’s friend. You see that a man is justified by works and not by faith alone. And in the same way, wasn’t Rahab the prostitute also justified by works when she received the messengers and sent them out by a different route? For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead. (James 2:23-26 HCSB)
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